joyfully counting my blessings

106.  A warm Texas Welcome!

107. Time with my youngest brother and our parents!

108. Seeing the spunk in my 73 year old mom

109. Time to be silly

110. Gifts from Nathan!

111. Spending time with Nathan for the first time in 2 years.

112.  This time of refreshing and renewal here in America.
113.  Hearing the Word preached in English and attending services with family.
114.  Finding out that Spencer was accepted at University of the Nations in Kona, Hawaii.
115.  Being able to talk on the phone with my oldest brother on his birthday.
116.  Arriving at my in laws house and finding a care package from my dear friend Erin.
117.  New clothes at great prices!
118.  Being able to enjoy the sound of my guys laughing together.
119. Going to see the movie Despicable Me as a family!

grateful

I am so grateful.

Grateful for the five years we were allowed to live in Russia. We made a home there. We had a life there. We have some very dear friends there. Looking back I can say that it was hard. Unbearably so at times. But we did it. I did it.

Being the only black woman in our region meant that I was a spectacle. Everyday I was stared at, photographed and questioned. I was never treated rudely. I was not harassed or harmed. Just annoyed.

Now we are here in America and there are lots of women of color around and I feel normal again. I didn't realize the joy I would feel at being ordinary.

I am indeed grateful.

and so it begins

I am not one to complain.

I am normally one of those glass half full kind of people.

But, I have to admit that we are entering into a season of life that I dread.  When we get on the plane Monday morning at 6 am we will be 'homeless'.  Homeless in the sense that we won't have a place to call ours until we get to Belmopan.  Our apartment here in Russia has been sold.  

For the next two and a half months we will be staying with friends and family... dependent on the kindness and hospitality of others.  Is this a bad thing?  No.  I believe that everyone should have the opportunity to use their gifts to bless others, even if those others are us.  (smile)

Knowing that I have a Father who never wastes a hurt, experience or trial but uses them all for His glory, I believe that this time will enrich our lives.  I believe that there will be bright spots over the next few months.   One of which will be seeing my mother and getting a hug from her for the first time in 3  years, another will be spending time with our oldest son whom we have not seen for 2 years.

However, I also have to acknowledge my sadness over leaving this apartment, selling our furniture and appliances, and leaving behind friends and church family.

My sons became men here.  My husband and I grew closer and became partners in ministry here.  I grew up spiritually here.  Letting go is never easy. 

I don't know how long it will take me to feel at home again once we reach Belize. 

I do know that it may take a while, a season, for me to let go of the feeling that Russia is home.

Multitude Monday

I feel at a loss for words right now. I write this list today out of discipline. Yes, I truly am grateful for each one of these gifts and yet I am also grieving the losses and finding it harder and harder each day to face the fact that our time here in Russia has indeed come to an end.


101. goodbye party with coworkers featuring great food, lots of laughs and a few tears...



102. tasty treats for dessert


103. Hedgehog birthday cakes for a 5 year old


104. cherry trees that tempt the neighborhood children to climb them and the view we have of it all for our apartment on the fourth floor!


105. watching a couple become an instant family through adopting siblings!

something to ponder

While reading an old issue of Discipleship Journal from 2002 I came across this story:

The famed 19th-century evangelist D.L. Moody was once asked if he was filled with the Spirit. "Yes," said Moody, "but I leak."

Several paragraphs later it goes on to explain:

To speak of "leaking" doesn't mean the Holy Spirit somehow seeps out through our pores; it is an acknowledgment that operating in a fallen world wears on (our) relationship with God.


I can acknowledge that sometimes I leak.  I am so grateful that when I am weak, or leaking, He can make me strong.  Only He can fill the cracks in my armor that come about from daily use. 

multitude monday

96. finding the courage to be me.

 97. hearing Tom speak at church

98. flowers just because

99. fresh bread from our favorite bakery

100. feeling loved

Something to ponder...

"Do you think things always have to have an explanation?"
"Yes. I believe that they do. But I think that with our human limitations we're not always able to understand the explanations. But, you see, Meg, just because we don't understand doesn't mean that the explanation doesn't exist."

excerpted from A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle